Mad Skills (or "Why I Stopped Being Scared and Learned to Love the Balm")

For Christmas, Laura thoughtfully bought me a portable art studio, something I didn't realize I wanted. I've been drawing at least a little bit every day, trying new techniques, styles, and mediums. I've found out important things about my drawing skills. Important things like "I have very few art skills."

And that's okay.

I remind myself constantly during the drawings that it's okay to suck; I give myself permission to be bad at art. Sometimes I will actively say to myself "No, that's okay. You can suck. Move on to the next step." And sometimes, when I'm following a tutorial that I realize is way beyond my skill limit, I give myself permission to stop before I get too frustrated.

I've lacked that in my life. If I've given up on something it's been out of frustration. I've always felt that I'm not good enough when I start a new skill (whether it be art, fitness, learning to spin poi, or any hundreds of other things), get frustrated very quickly, and then when I "take a break" it's actually just me stopping, quitting, leaving it behind. Which sucks.

Now, I give myself permission to suck, which means that I don't feel bad when what's on paper doesn't match what's in my head. It will, some day.