Ghosts

[jmfargo]

When I was a child, I taught myself chess. I was about ten years old, and good enough to bring my father to a stalemate. Not great, not a genius, and definitely not an amazing feat for me to learn the game. Unremarkable, even, except for one major factor:

I learned from a man long dead.

I didn't read books, I didn't ask other people how to play. I taught myself, in my room, by playing with someone who wasn't there. We sat on the floor, because I didn't have a table. I sat with my legs folded underneath me as small children often do, and he sat cross-legged on the other side of the board. He taught me how all the pieces moved. When he tried to explain "castling," I looked it up.

I don't remember much about him. He was a middle-aged man, and while I want to say he wore overalls, I can tell that that's just my now-brain putting details that I don't actually remember into the scene. I don't remember hearing him speak, but I remember him saying things to me, like his words were just there, and I plucked them from the aether. He was real, even though I could see through him. He had a name; I don't remember it.

I write this while grimacing. I've never actually told anybody this story before, for a lot of reasons. I wear a frown because while I write it I know that if someone were to tell the story to me, if I were to read it somewhere else, I'd nod politely and secretly place them in the category of "crazy people." I can't help it. I watch shows like Ghost Hunters, and point out how everything's faked. I listen to stories, and think the person must be lying, or crazy.

I know, for a fact, that ghosts exist. I remember, clearly, interacting with them. I was scared of many, intrigued by others. One saved my life.

At the same time, I know that ghosts can't exist. Everyone in my childhood told me I was either seeing things or making things up. They couldn't see what was right there with them, they didn't believe me, stopped listening. They told me I had an active imagination, and that someday I'd stop having imaginary friends.

They were right. It stopped.

My rational mind, the one that was trained to be what it is today through experience, refuses to see ghosts, to believe ghost stories, and doubts its own memories of seeing them. It tells me that spiritual creatures, ghosts, spooks, haunts, demons, don't exist. Can't.

And then I remember playing chess; being passed condiments at the lunch table when nobody else was in the house; a toy in the playroom rolling across the 10 foot gap between me and it, coming to a rest next to me; a boy standing over me, telling me to hold on, that it wasn't my time; seeing people that couldn't be there because, well, they were dead.

So tell me your ghost stories. I'll be intrigued. I'll want to know more. I'll even ask to hear more. I'll just think you're crazy.

Then I'll tell you my stories.

It's okay. You can think I'm crazy. I understand. I think I am.

Comments

[rain-herself.livejournal.com]

I love this.

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

Glad to hear it. *s*

I felt a little melancholy after writing it, so hearing it was well received was nice.

[angielabrie.livejournal.com]

This was fabulous..I got goosebumps!


I hope you post it in LJ Idol :o)

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

I did. :)

[kmg-365.livejournal.com]

I watch shows like Ghost Hunters, and point out how everything's faked.

My cousins were on Ghost Hunters. While some of Jason and Grant's evidence is questionable and, in some cases, fake, my cousins' experiences were not.

It was interesting hearing them tell us about the experience with GH...as interesting as it was hearing them tell us about how their ghosts liked to turn all the lights on in the house, rock in rocking chairs, open and close cabinets...

My wife would never want to live in that house!

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

I'd love to go on the show, experience it myself, even become a part of that team. A part of me misses doing the hunting I did in my teen years, and to be able to do it with cool equipment would be awesome.

I even tried applying to one of the local ghost hunting groups, but I think it's run by, well, my mom always said if I didn't have anything nice to say I shouldn't say anything.

Your cousins' house and experience with GH sounds interesting.

[kmg-365.livejournal.com]

Your cousins' house and experience with GH sounds interesting

The insight into GH was pretty cool. They said that Grant still e-mails them to check up on them. They thought it was interesting what they focused on. My cousins made a passing reference to seeing a shadowy figure, and that became the focus of the investigation. My cousins were saying "ummm...yeah, that's a minor thing...what happens typically is x."

I guess Pilgrim didn't thing x was interesting enough.

It was a three day event. One day for the investigation (they said they filmed the drive up to the house and the lights-out bit a million times). Another day for the crew to come out sans GH to shoot shots inside of the house. Those are the shots that are interspersed with the investigation that make it look like they're looking down hallways and such. The reveal was the third day and they said it took hours.

They've had several other paranormal groups investigate their home, too.

I would have moved out!

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

I definitely would have stayed in that house. I sometimes regret I'm not closer to my parent's house, if only because I'd be petitioning to get it on the show.

The experience sounds interesting, and more intensive than I thought it would be.

[jfs.livejournal.com]

While some of Jason and Grant's evidence is questionable and, in some cases, fake, my cousins' experiences were not.

An LJ friend of mine has a similar problem with many of the ghost-hunter / paranormal programmes on TV over here. He attributes it to the fact that the programme makers are under pressure to produce something TV-worthy, and that, much like wildlife programmes, you can't expect spirits to perform on demand.

The temptation to fake something that you know to be true when you're under that sort of pressure must be quite intense.

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

I've always said that they all need headset cameras, or something similar. Too often you get "What was that?!" and then find out that the cameras were all pointing in the wrong direction while they were looking right at whatever it was.

And yes, I imagine the pressure is high to show some kind of proof. I think since Season 1 they've gotten a LOT better about not just faking everything, but it's definitely still there.

[kmg-365.livejournal.com]

The temptation to fake something that you know to be true when you're under that sort of pressure must be quite intense.


I wonder where the pressure is coming from. Early seasons pulled good ratings, and they were hesitant to call places haunted. I wonder if they feel pressures now from the places they are investigating. The majority of the places are businesses, and substantiating their claims of hauntings would be good business for them.

Personally, I watch the show because I like watching the investigators interact. Maybe that's why it is called Ghost Hunters...the show is more about the people doing the hunting than it is the entities being hunted.

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

I thought the first season was the worst for fakes, honestly. That's when every little thing that happened was caught on camera; chairs moving on their own, mystical black shadows retreating into the darkness, etc.

But maybe I'm remembering wrong. That's very possible.

[kmg-365.livejournal.com]

Ah yes, but they were in the minority. Most of the places they didn't find anything and, when they did, they were reluctant to call a place "haunted".

Now every episode has Jay and Grant saying "did you see that? A shadow just walked over there!" And in the reveal they'll say "based on our personal experiences, we think it is haunted."

In past episodes, personal experiences alone were never enough for them to call a place haunted. Even if the evidence was fabricated, they at least had evidence. I fear Ghost Hunters is heading the way of Most Haunted.

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

Okay, I see what you're saying, and I agree.

The worst offender out of any of the shows, however, is the spin-off: Ghost Hunters International. Have you watched that? I feel it honestly gives ghost hunters a bad name.

[kmg-365.livejournal.com]

We watched it, yes, and it is absolutely terrible. The cast members have no rapport whatsoever. Andy was annoying when he was on GH and is even worse on GHI. Rob looks so uncomfortable in his role as team leader and with being on television that it is painful to watch. Brian was always good for a laugh, but they barely showed the guy. Donna turned in to a whiny, frightened goofball. And Barry? Barry is a freaking joke.

Worst. Show. Ever.

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

I think Rob was fantastic when he was on the original show (he's the goofy looking one, right?) but as team leader you're right, he just seems so uncomfortable.

I do still watch it from time to time on Hulu, but more because I'm interested in learning the local legends. Once they start getting into the actual hunting part I go to something else. Is that weird?

[kmg-365.livejournal.com]

Once they start getting into the actual hunting part I go to something else. Is that weird?


Not particularly, no. The hunters aren't the least bit interesting, and are bordering on annoying.

[sydb42.livejournal.com]

I don't have any ghost stories as I've never seen any. The only reason I don't just outright say ghosts don't exist is I've heard so many otherwise credible people claim to have seen/interacted with them. I figure they can't *all* be delusional. ;)

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

Logically, I say exactly the same thing (except for the "not seeing them myself" bit, of course), and tell myself that not everyone that sees them is crazy. At the same time, when most folks start talking about what they've seen or experienced, I always feel as though they're pushing it too much, like they're faking, and don't realize it.

I don't know. It's weird. :)

[akdidge.livejournal.com]

So tell me your ghost stories.

When I was in 2nd (sometime around then) grade we lived with my grandmother in Pennslyvania. Her house was an old victorian-style house and even had a (mostly) dead elm tree in the front lot. I remember her attic being almost that of any old horror flick in that it was covered in dust, fine, white linens, with cobwebs in the corners, and the only light came from a small window up near the peak and an old light bulb that swung from the ceiling.

Now this might be where you'd expect me to have seen a ghost, or that I was scared to death as a child to go up there. On the contrary, I didn't mind it all, nor did I ever see any ghosts up there.

But what I do remember is being told that there was aghost that lived with my grandmother. His name was Harry and that he was there to make sure I did my homework, and in all other ways behaved as a young boy should. This was repeated anytime I did something half-way wrong in that, "You don't want to upset Harry, do you?" Doors would slowly creak shut from areas of the house that no one was in, and occasionally the lights would flicker. When I was older I attributed it to the fact that the house was old, as was the wiring, and that the doors weren't on balance, and thus swung eerily closed on occasion.

Now fast forward to christmas of that year when I was a kid, I got a rubik cube as one of my gifts. Like any child I had it completely, and utterly mixed-up to the point of no return. My mother and father, and even grandmother tried to fix it after I had mixed it up. No one could get all the colors arranged correctly. I remember setting it on the mantle one night before going to bed, and asking aloud if Harry could solve it.

The next morning it was solved. As a kid I thought this was the coolest thing in the world, and while I asked many times for Harry to either show himself or when I tried to prove his existance to my friends, nothing ever occurred. As I grew up I figured my parents had finally figured out the formula for solving that pesky thing.

Then, one day, I asked them about it. They both shook their head and said they never touched it that night, nor did my grandmother. Harry did fix the rubik cube. And that right there gives me goose bumps even remembering it.

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

That's pretty awesome, really. Strange that that's how he would choose to show his presence, but still, really cool.

[akdidge.livejournal.com]

The weird thing is that "Harry" wasn't a family name, nor a name that anyone in my family knew, but that's what the ghost's name was. It never did anything mean spirited (pun intended), but I recall a couple of things that, looking back on with an objective, scientific mindset still get me to crinkle my eyebrows with a, "how in the hell?!?"

[shadowwolf13]

Wonderful entry!

I believe ... but I know I'm strange. ;)

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

"Strange" is good. I'm still strange, and I believe even in my disbelief, if that makes any kind of sense.

[shadowwolf13]

Of course it does .... in a twisted sort of way. ;)

[brightflashes.livejournal.com]

what an experience! Very good entry, too! : )

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

Out of all my experiences in that realm of life, that's the one story I've never really shared. Even as a child, I knew it was odd. Of course, I thought the part my parents would be upset about would be me talking to strangers...

[lilmissmagic71.livejournal.com]

This is a nice take on the topic... very well done.

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I thought about taking a bye this week, and waited until I saw my name up on the list of shame to decide that I should take on the topic. I was happy with what came of it.

[http://users.livejournal.com/____hejira/]

I love love love this. You told a real life ghost story while simultaniously acknowledging the implausibility of it all, but without denying the reality of what happened to you. It is what it is, and you don't go through any effort to scare us or play up creepy details. Fabulous.

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

Wow. I'm flattered. Thank you.

[drgnflydreaming.livejournal.com]

It all started when I was about 4,and continues to this day. My most memorable times were when we lived in a house that was part of the underground railroad, but I've had experiences in houses we looked at buying as well.

I've even had experiences here, in my new house, no one has ever lived here, but the property it is on was once owned by a woman that was beaten to death and then her house was burned down. Let's just say I asked for permission before we moved here.

It would take me years to tell all of them.

[drgnflydreaming.livejournal.com]

Oh, and I voted for you earlier.

[kathrynrose.livejournal.com]

Nicely done.

[alycewilson.livejournal.com]

I liked this story. Good job.

[baxaphobia.livejournal.com]

Isn't everyone just a bit crazy? Some just hide it better than others! Good entry!

[bodlon.livejournal.com]

There's a girl at my old flat who has tea parties in the wee hours, over where I used to keep my bookshelves. There's not a lot left of her, I don't think. I'm not sure I know what that means.

Definitely not crazy.

[rosepurr.livejournal.com]

That is a great ghost story.

[jenandbronze.livejournal.com]

Great story. I thought *I* was crazy! Although, the only ghosts I saw are animals... haven't seen people--yet.

[thndrstd.livejournal.com]

I really enjoyed this entry. Thanks for sharing.

[roina-arwen.livejournal.com]

That's just awesome - thanks for sharing!

[tigrkittn.livejournal.com]

Wonderfully told.

[yahalomay.livejournal.com]

This is a wonderful story; you told it really well, especially the opening two paragraphs. Ghost phenomenon is so interesting.

[jfargo.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I appreciate the compliment!